My blog hasn’t been as loved I’d like in the past 12 months or so. I promised many wedding DIY tips and how to blogs, none of which I’ve really had the chance to put down and certainly none to publish! I will… I really will. And I’m going to set myself a deadline of July!
There is a reason for selecting that deadline… and it looks like this:
That’s right, yours truly, Mrs OC is big fat pregnant. 13+ weeks! Due in July.
Here are some things I’ve discovered in my first trimester:
- I am terrible at keeping secrets about myself – especially happy ones or ones that are consuming my entire daily life. So really who can blame me, right? I know some of my friends who were definitely better at it though.
Me? I found myself laying subtle hints to one or two of my friends but without actually confirming it until further down the line. In my defense, it was the festive season for a good chunk of my first tri and everyone who knows me knows I like a glass of wine or several… and that I can’t miss a celebration of any kind because what better time is there to open up the champers? So, yeah, my work team were very suspicious at our team Christmas do. And, I have to say, the relief I felt when I was able to tell the world was just huge.
- What in the hell is this tiredness? It’s like something off the charts, off the planet… seriously, jetlag knows nothing in comparison to this utter devastation of any (usually) energetic soul. What came with this tiredness was a not just a desperate urge to sleep at various random points throughout the day (even when a decent 8+ hours might have been had the night prior) but also I just couldn’t summon enthusiasm. My usually bubbly and positive personality seemed to have been swallowed whole by a darker, unmotivated, unhappy, not-very-nice version of me. And the worst part with the tiredness I felt in the first trimester, was that all the things that I thought might fix it just plain didn’t work. If I tried to exercise in my usual way – e.g. boot camp – then I just ended up coming home needing to sleep for 2 hours to recover. And if thought I’d eat some energy foods to get myself there I was wrong. I would try guzzling plenty of veggies or a nice chicken salad but actually found that food I would normally eat to give myself a boost was just making me feel sick.
I didn’t want to do Christmas, I didn’t feel like reading, I didn’t feel like socialising and I especially didn’t feel like doing any work. There are times I would just sit there, at my desk, and stare hopefully at my screen – either wishing the huge workload would disappear or that my ability to care about it would come back.
- Nausea is a bitch. I haven’t (thankfully) been one of those mums-to-be who is racked with sickness; throwing up from the minute you get out of bed and non-stop until your body finally sleeps. I have spewed a little bit, a handful of times, but only ever prompted by something gross – a smell, something off tasting. It was an instant reaction and happily, it was over quickly. BUT I did feel almost constantly sick, I think from about 6 or 7 weeks until probably 12 weeks. At it’s worse I would just feel unable to cope with anything – like the nausea and tiredness went hand in hand.
What I cottoned on to after a couple of weeks of struggling, was that if I ate even when I didn’t feel like it, then it keeps both at bay, a little. I can remember being in the supermarket with Mr OC and the lady at the checkout taking one look at me and telling me I could sit down on the end of the checkout, where they put all the filled shopping bags. I just collapsed there and thanked her with some odd, small noises of gratitude. Don’t you feel so sorry for me? No, but seriously, my advice to anyone with manageable nausea (i.e. not the hard out stuff that needs prescriptive medicine to fix) is to eat, and listen to what your body wants. If it says cereal and it’s 5pm then do it. If it’s a can of old-fashioned lemonade – damn well go and get it. Just don’t go crazy and consume heaps – it’s got a lot of sugar! Your body is telling you what it needs, and trying to continue to eat the things you might have been used to eating (especially if by and large you were a healthy, clean eater) might not be the answer. It certainly wasn’t for me and as soon as I tuned into my cravings I found things a lot more tolerable!
- Hello mood swings! If I wasn’t being a little bit snappy at a workmate, I was probably letting everyone at home know that I wasn’t going to take any shit lying down. Whether it was necessary or not. I guess when you’re feeling like crap it’s hard not to let things get to you but also, according to my hubby I just turned into some kind of crazed woman who would sometimes be fine but sometimes snap at something pretty small. I guess while I don’t enjoy being a bitch, ordinarily I am a pretty nice person (I think!?), however I can remember just feeling something along the lines of “well if you’ve said or done something unnecessary or that’s going to piss me off then you probably shouldn’t have said or done it”. Period.
I think while your mood swings might make you scary, and emotional, they also do cut some of the BS out!
Yet, the thing I probably found most alarming wasn’t the snappy, mean me. It was the odd moments of feeling so miserable that it actually shocked me. It happened just a couple of times – probably on days when hormones were raging, nausea was niggling and exhaustion was rife – I would sit there with that kind of feeling where you have nothing to look forward to. It might start with worrying about getting through the first trimester without miscarriage, and go from there to just thinking “I don’t feel excited – I don’t remember how it feels to feel excited – I’m never going to feel excited about this baby – what’s wrong with me?” and then as quick as it came on it would be gone. Like it wasn’t a real thought. And believe me, I am so SO excited about baby – and now my mostly normal self has returned with this 13th week of pregnancy, I am feeling enthusiastic about just about everything!! Hormones are seriously scary things.
- But wow! Hormones help make miracles grow in your belly!
I think it must have been about 3 or 4 days after I found out I was pregnant that I was walking down the street in Sydney’s city centre and I just thought to myself – right now, inside me a life is growing. Right now, I’m harbouring a tiny human life and somehow my body knows what to do – how to make it grow and develop. How to help it function by using my body. How to create each tiny but essential part of the human anatomy that is going to make an entire person that will one day walk around on these same streets and breathe this same air. And I just got goosebumps thinking about what a miracle that is.
New life is amazing. It might be common, but that doesn’t make it any less amazing. I am so blessed to be a part of that process.
What was your first trimester like? How did you adjust to being pregnant for the first time?